He said if he had $1000, he would spend it fixing his biggest insecurity. He would then use the newfound confidence from fixing that insecurity to rebuild his empire—brick by brick.
This idea really resonated with me.
When I was younger, I was always chasing the latest looks, styles and trends to fit in with my classmates, sorority sisters and later on, my coworkers. I always felt like I was wearing a mask, never getting to be my authentic self.
Despite my efforts, I never felt confident, and getting ready to go out was something I dreaded. As I got older, my style just seemed to take a backseat. I wore the same few pairs of yoga pants and shirts, my “uniform,” as my sister would mockingly call it as it changed throughout varies phases of my life. I felt unattractive and down about myself for years, it had built up slowly over time.
When TikTok started gaining in popularity, I joined and began following creators and influencers who had styles that genuinely appealed to me. I realized that my style needed to be something that I loved if I was going to build confidence. With my weight loss and nothing in my closet fitting me anymore, I saw an opportunity to rebuild my wardrobe over the next year, a little at a time.
For months, throughout the winter of 2022-2023, I researched and made Pinterest boards, learning what my style was, what I liked, as well as doing research on brands to compare quality and price. Some pieces, like a leather jacket or trench coat, were worth the investment, while others needed to last a couple of years. I found great brands like Amazon, H&M, Mango, and Target.
Some might disagree on H&M, but their recent collections, especially their Premium Collection, have impressed me. Even their regular line has improved, offering cozy, well-fitting sweaters that I love. Buying winter clothes in summer from H&M also saved me money thanks to their member-exclusive deals.
After you join, for every
Amazon provided affordable, stylish pieces for everyday wear. I bought most of my bodysuits and updated my shoe collection from there. Their Prime Try Before You Buy option was a game-changer, allowing me to try on items at home before committing to them.
Target became my go-to for workout clothes. Brands like JoyLab and All in Motion offered quality and affordability that surpassed even my Lululemon items. I felt comfortable and carefree, not worried about ruining expensive gear. Plus, they offer the Target Circle Rewards Program, which is free to join and let’s you earn rewards and apply them to purchases, ultimately saving you more money.
Mango, known for its quality, also had surprisingly affordable options. I scored a stunning little black dress there, perfect for all seasons.
If you love Mango as much as I do, check out their outerwear. Currently, Mango is having their Up to 70% Off Summer Sale promotion going on and you can get some wool coats, leather jackets, trench coats, sweaters and more at great prices!
Remember when Mike “The Situation” from Jersey Shore said, “When you look good, you feel good, and when you feel good, good things happen”? It’s true.
When I started feeling good in my clothes, I held my head higher. I went from avoiding eye contact due to the shame of feeling ugly and being seen as weak, vulnerable, and exposed. Working on my appearance on the outside did more than just make me feel confident; it pushed me to make changes in other areas of my life where I lacked confidence.
It forced me to learn how to look myself in the eyes for the first time.
For the first time, I had to confront me. I had to say those awful negative thoughts out loud to start healing the part of me that believed them in the first place.
Each blog post on HazyPlay reflects the steps I took, the lessons learned, and the advice I wish someone had shared with me. HazyPlay features book recommendations, style tips, healthy habits and routines, spiritual wisdom and lessons, as well as motivation and mindset articles.
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